Is it too late to start with your heart in a headlock?

these are my xmas lights. I love them.

I kinda feel like I had an epiphany or something. Essentially, "Don't worry about what others think about you. Do what you want to, and do what is necessary to obtain happiness." I feel that embarrassment is a waste of emotion. You've got better things to do than sit around worrying about that silly thing you said to your coworkers, or that time that you tripped on the sidewalk in front of a crowd of people. It's okay! Everyone does it! You're human. You make mistakes and it's alright, just brush it off and learn from it. This is obviously so much easier said than done, but in the end, it's so worth it. I was single for 2.5 months last year. It was a really good thing, because I took that time to find myself and learn to stand up for myself and who I am. Don't lose yourself, and if you do, search and find it again; life is so much better when you can love yourself.

No one else will have me, only you.

It's been a busy few months since I've moved out here to Philly. Or, really, "In West Philadelphia, born and raised. On a playground is where I spent most of my days..." Good ole' Fresh Prince haha.

I am going to rant on here about things that annoy me a lot while driving in the city. Not much in this entry, but I've developed crazy road rage that's 10x worse than it was when I lived in Erie or Butler. I'll tell you my biggest pet peeve that every single driver in Philadelphia does: NOT USING TURN SIGNALS!!! I've never had so many people cut me off or suddenly turn without signaling! And to make matters worse, most other drivers just assume everyone else won't signal, so many times people have gone around me in intersections cause they think I might be turning. wtf? People are insane! But it's kinda fun driving here. My favorite time to drive is when I'm coming home from work sometimes at 10 or so at night. I take Chestnut from 63rd to 44th street, and the lights are timed to change for traffic, so it's a lot of fun to drive. Especially cause I totally change lanes a lot and it's fun :) I think I'd be a kickass stunt driver heh.

The leaves picture was taken at Bartram's Garden. It's the oldest living botanical garden in the U.S.! It's pretty great, too. I enjoyed taking this picture of yellow ginkgo leaves!

Here is a picture of some bubbles with a light on the other side. Bubbles can be very entertaining, even for adults ;)

Here's Chris and I at Bartram's. The skyline is actually behind us but it was all misty-raining out, so you could barely see it. Hi to everyone that I miss!! :D

So I guess I embarrass people that I'm walking with sometimes. If I see something neat, I have to take a picture of it!! I know I probably look odd, bending down on the sidewalk to take pictures of the side of the building, lol. But, I don't care. I've realized that you should just enjoy life, and not care about what others think of you. I am extremely klutzy, and sometimes I trip over my own feet, or a crack in the sidewalk, etc. Now that I live in a big city, there are usually at least 10 people that watch me trip each time lol. And I just brush it off, act like nothing happened and keep walking lol. It's fun actually! If people react, just act like they're nuts. I mean, tripping is usually an accident. Why get embarrassed by something you couldn't help? I feel the same way about, um, bowel movements, burps, farts, etc. These are bodily functions people! We have to do these things to survive, lol. What in the hell is there to get embarrassed about? I mean, yea, sure, they're a bit gross. But who cares? I feel the same way about buying tampons and pads. Women who get embarrassed by this shouldn't! I mean, obviously, there's a good chance if you're a woman, you're menstruating. It's okay, it's not like it's used haha! This makes me think of my plastic bag boycott. I'll get into that another time...

I absolutely love this picture. Again, it was taken at Bartram's Gardens. I could have gotten it in slightly better focus, but it was really windy and I'm lucky to have gotten this! :)

Falling asleep to the sound of sirens..

We learned the first night we slept in our apartment that we must live awfully close to a fire station. It's a couple of blocks away. Luckily for us, it's situated on the one-way street that comes towards us; any fires to the west of this station get the quick response from the firemen. This means we hear sirens constantly. I just heard 4 firetrucks roar past, horns blaring loudly, since Chestnut is a pretty well-traveled road. I didn't sleep well the first week here; the sirens are tough to get used to at first. So are the stereos and loud music I hear. I have to say, I don't really listen to jazz music, but every time I do hear it I smile. For some reason, jazz makes me think of Christmas. Which is strange, and I don't really have a reason for this connection. Lol. I've never heard so much rap music in my life since I have living here lol. I love love having the windows open at night, so I have to put up with it. Dogs bark all the time, too. Especially a big sounding dog that lives somewhere up 44th.

Four weeks into the school year, I've started reading my textbooks. As they came in the mail or through Fed-Ex I would put them on the top of my desk. It's been hard buckling down this semester. I just want to go explore and shop and stuff, and I haven't been concentrating very well. Time to get to work, though. One of my classes is way tough; it's about special education assessments and it's a lot to learn. But I think I like it. I took notes on the first 4 chapters of the book today. I'm slowly starting to get pretty interested in it, especially since I work a little less now than I did last year. And every year before that since I was 17.

I've been sick for the past week. I think I'm just about over it. My sinuses spaz out every fall like clockwork. It was a miserable last week; I missed a few days of work and a class. I still feel like sleeping a lot but hopefully that'll go away soon.

Um, I love my dog a lot. Like she's so freaking cute sometimes. Chris and I alternate who has to get up at 6 or 7 am to take her out; she seems to have figured out who is to take her out that day. This morning she woke me up by once again laying on my chest, touching her paws to my face and whimpering/growling at me to get up. I just wish I could take photographs with my eyes. If I could have any superpower, that is seriously what I would pick. I'd just plug a USB drive into myself and save the photos I'd taken that week. I'm gonna start searching thrift stores for magic lamps that may have a genie inside of it. :D

I love picniks!

So I discovered picnik.com yesterday. Well, actually, Chris showed me it. It's essentially photoshop online, for free! Needless to say, I've been on the site nonstop since then. I especially love the 1960's effect, it's amazing! I adore the look of old photographs! :) Here are a few samples of stuff I've done with some of my pictures, feel free to comment!

Streets of cobbled stone.

This is my cutie-pie honey-bunch Pixie. Isn't she just the cutest thing you've ever seen?? She looks messy cause she was just trying to break the 'neck' of the stuffed rabbit at her feet. Goofball.

I am super sore today! My friend Kelly, from my old store in Erie, came down and visited me yesterday! It was great to see another familiar face! We had a lot of fun; I took her on the subway and we went to the Walgreens downtown. That trip reminded me of why I could never work in a store in the city-too much chaos, disorder, and rude employees! Ugh! The people in the photo lab didn't know what they were doing. I showed her the liberty bell, too! :)

Later on, Chris and I helped De'Adra move most of the rest of her stuff from her original new apt to her new new apartment lol. Got to see Meghan, too which was again fun! Then the four of us walked all around, got a bite to eat, and let's just say my legs are killing me from all the walking! I have to get in shape soon! I'm pathetic lol.

I want to write more insightful things on here. I never can think of anything good when I have the time to write, though. My creative spark is gone at the moment, I'm thinking it's cause of the stress of moving and such. I hope I get it back soon, though, I need to create!!

City of Brotherly Love.

This is the statue in Love Park here in Philly. It's pretty cool :). I decided today that I absolutely despise tourists. When Chris and I are trying to explore the city, they're EVERYWHERE and ALWAYS in my way! I know, I know, I've lived here for barely two weeks..but still! The tourists here walk really slowly, they don't pay any attention to anybody around them, and they constantly stop in the middle of the sidewalk without paying attention to who may be walking right behind them. Retards. We went to Independence Hall today, and saw the Liberty Bell and all that fun historical stuff. And it was cool, really cool, except for the annoying tourists. They constantly kept pushing me, and getting in the way of my photographs, and I definitely could feel my social anxiety trying to make an appearance. Would have really sucked if I had a panic attack LOL. Would have had to punch someone in the face! Heh. Oh well, I do live in a very tourist-run city sooo I guess I've gotta suck it up!!

We've really gotten into the swing of things here. I love this city! :)

"Art is the center of the real world"

That's what the colored tiles across the middle of this picture say. This mosaic is part of the Magic Garden on South Street in Philly. It's pretty amazing; these mosaics are all over. We didn't get to go in here yet, but we will soon! :)

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia!

So, last Sunday, Chris and I moved to Philadelphia. I love it here; so does he. And this move has been a trial, I'll tell you right now. Everything that could go wrong, has.

It's felt pretty worth it so

far. I love our apartment. Not the biggest place, but the room

s are pretty spacious-big windows and high ceilings :)

This picture was taken in Old City, the

oldest part of Philly haha if that wasn't obvious. This

alley is the oldest residential street still in existence! I love this neat old history stuff. So interesting.

..lay entwined together in a bed of clover..

I want to just create art for the rest of my life.  I take photographs constantly.  Sometimes up to a thousand in one week.  I see things much differently than others do.  A friend asked me how I can go around taking pictures of flowers and inanimate objects..I just want to.  I do it for no one but myself.  I don't like photographing people much.  Especially posed situations.  Too boring.  I like to show people things that I notice.  I'd like to start posting some of those photos on here; feel free to comment as often as you'd like.  Thanks!  :)

scattered.brain

                                              This donkey looks really sad.  
                                              Cute little guy.
                                              The sky one morning while I drove Chris to school.
                                              Aren't these turtles adorable?!  :)

                                                        ---------------------------      

I'm free!!  

I had my last final today, and ahh...

I feel so relieved to be done with school for a few months.

Yes, the move is going to stress me out.  

But, not nearly as much as school.

I have so many plans for this summer already.  

I have to spend all of my time with several different people.

I gotta be a super great aunt so Wren will remember me when I move.

I'm painting vases right now.  I've also been pressing flowers, and growing them too.

I'm averaging 400 pictures a week.  Taking that many.  Of everything.

I love these cool spring nights.  They smell amazing..

The song 'daylight' by matt and kim is insanely catchy.  dl it.

the times, they are a-changin'

So it's official.  Come August, Chris and I will be residents of Philadelphia.  I'm pretty pumped for this!  :)  I have two good friends who live out there already, so that's just great!  Here's to a happy future!

You keep your sins in the ceiling; I keep mine close to my chest.

Chris came home today! He had a good time in the Big Apple.

Pixie and I are both thrilled that he's back.  :)

----

Random surprise today.  We now get Bravo, Sci-Fi, and the History Channel on our cable.  Why?  Beats me!  But I'm pretty excited about it.

...and sometimes I can't stop smiling.

Things have changed oh, so quickly in the last few months.  But, in such a great way.  I feel...happy most days.  That's not been the case for a while.  The winter trimester at school has just one week left.  I took one more class this semester than last.  I also worked one more day a week.  Yet I haven't hardly felt stressed at all.  This isn't the usual at all.  I inherited from my mom the ability to be far too caring, far too much of a worrier.  It's not living.  It's being consumed with anxiety daily, worrying about everything.  I'm trying to look more at the big picture.  Shake off the small, unimportant things, and let go.  

Chris is going to NYC for a few days.  He's presenting a paper he wrote at a conference there.  Damnit, he's smart :D I'm going to miss him a lot.  He's leaving on valentine's day, but that doesn't matter half as much as being together on my birthday does.  Birthdays are our own special days.  It's when people think about you, remembering your birthday.  And we'll ignore the fact that they probably only remembered because they saw the reminder on facebook.  :P

The Steelers Won the Superbowl!!!!

Hell yes!  It's days like today that I feel incredibly proud to be from right outside Pittsburgh!  The Steelers are Superbowl 43 Champs!!!! 

HERE WE GO, STEELERS!!  HERE WE GO!!!

break in case of fire.

I hate roommates.  I would adore living with just my boyfriend and my cute little dog.  No more left-up toilet seats.  No more smelly dark yellow piss swimming around in the toilet bowl.  No more digging snow shovels out of the three feet of snow on our front yard, after a certain someone threw it from the sidewalk instead of walking the 10 feet to set it on our porch.  No more being kept awake by loud, powerpop music late at night.  No more washing dishes for anyone but myself.  No more buying toilet paper every other week because someone has to make a bowel movement several times a day, every day.  Oh, god, how wonderful it will be to live in a more reasonably-sized apartment; no more extravagant gas and electric bills.  And no more blown circuit breakers because everyone just has to have a mini-fridge in their bedroom.  When there's a regular sized one right down the stairs.  Jesus christ.  

I am so damn passive-agressive.  I have no balls, and I always let others walk all over me.  It's happened four times now.  But this time, I'm fighting back.  The old me lays down and becomes the welcome mat at the front door.  But the new me;  the new me takes the toilet paper from the bathroom, so that you can wipe your shit-stained ass with your smelly fingers.  :)

2009.

This year has been lovely, thus far.  

My good mood has continued for an entire month; this is rare for me.  

I'm hoping for many more months of this.

Obama became our president last week.  This has overjoyed me to no extent!

There is so much hope for our country now.  In his first days, he told of his plan to shut down Guantanamo, which was a mistake from when it's doors were opened.

As a future teacher, I feel ecstatic to know that children who live in urban areas and in poverty now have a hero- a black man who was able to become the most powerful man in our country, if not in our world.  This is just inexplainable.  This means that those children have something to aim for.  

YES WE CAN!